New Year New Blog...Post

Hmm...where do I start. Well... HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! Im only a few weeks late. Im not to good at this whole blog my life on the internet thing. Im listening to some Josh Groban late at night while my roomate sleeps. I have so much running through my mind and I feel the need to get it all out!

Well...to start out Justin got home from the mission on Dec. 21. It was a sweet moment. I got a hand-shake, that didnt help my fear of him not liking me when he came home. But after a few moments it turned into a semi-hug and I decided I could handle that. All my RM friends down here in Thatcher warned me to no end of how he would be so weird when he came home and to be honest I was really looking forward to it. We got home and it was kinda akward but cool. We talked a little and he came off as a mature 21 yr. old adult. I thought to myself "ya I can handle this" but as the next day came Justin was back to his normal self. Spoke a little funny sometimes but he was just about the same, just tired.

Christmas eve came real soon. We got together with a group of people and did our christmas elf tradition. I really do look forward to it every year. We all get together and each family drops off a few things for the 12 days of christmas, and on chirstmas eve we all get together and drop off the "mother load" of gifts. Its an amazing feeling to be helping a family who needs it. It really brings home the true christmas spirit. After thats all done we go home and open our one gift, which happens to be the same gift every year. (I really do think this is my mom's favorite part of christmas.) Which also happens to be matching pj's so our family wakes up matching christmas morning. But this year Beau was a little more excited than everyone else. I think he forgot maybe? But as he's tearing through the wrapping paper he has this crazed look like he is about to open the greatest gift in the whole entire world!! Right as he opens the box and realizes that its pajamas he smacks the box and throws it out of the way and yells "this is crap!!" I dont think I have laughed that hard in my life. I was just sitting there starring at him while he throws his little fit about it. I just looked at him and was like 'what were you expecting? We get the same thing on christmas eve every year, I would assume you would know that seeing as this is your 11th chirstmas now." And I started laughing again, and we all laughed and finally Beau started laughing. It was a funny little moment. Christmas day was good though, I got what I needed and we watched some movies and just relaxed. It was nice to be home with the family.

New Years... New Years wasnt so sweet. I had a good dinner with my family. After I picked up Caitlin and we went to holly butlers house and played some games. It was a good time, but we decided to go to this girls house who we didnt know...but my brother and a few other people we knew were there. So we show up and its so akward. We knew like 3 people and so me and cait just stuck to ourselves waiting till the ball dropped. We didnt even get to see that happen. We all went outside so they could set off little bombs of confetti and silly string. Were all outside and they start counting down from like 30, as we get to ten someone was like "hey its already new years we were off". I was like sweet im glad were already starting off slow. But

everybody continues with there new years kiss. Me and Cait are just standin there in the middle of it all not knowing anyone. it was actually kinda funny but not. Anyways New Years should have been better.

School started up again. Its been nice. I really enjoy my Sociology class. Im taking it for kicks and giggles but im really likin it so far. We got a lot of new boys...theres some pretty hott ones. Im still holding out for my prince charming. Im pretty sure he is never going to come. Im hoping he is lost or possibly making millions at the moment and that is why we havent met yet. Who knows but im pretty burnt out on this whole waiting thing. My dad tells me thats it when your not expecting it thats when it will happen...ive not been expecting anything for a LONG time now and still nothing. So I really think im beginning to accept my life of lonelyness with 500 cats...maybe ill do dogs since im allergic to cats... who knows. You can start calling me crazy dog lady who lives alone. haha ok I really doubt I could let myself live like that. Im really not as desperate as im coming off. I kinda like the single life. and i know that im no where near wanting to get married. I swear everyone and there mother got married over break here, and about a thousand more couples are getting married during our next break or right after school gets out. Its crazy.

Im really glad to be back with the friends ive made. I really dont know what I would do without them. They have helped me become the person I have developed into over the past semester. These girls are so truly amazing and Im so gald to be able to call them friends (that sounds so incredibly gay, but i really do mean it!)

Anyhow with the New Year here and me getting older and more independant ive been thinking alot lately about the person i want to become and the characteristics and personality traits I have and the ones that I want to obtain as im maturing. I really want to become more involved in my religion. Ive realised that im a big slacker, I have been thinking about it alot and have come to realize that I really am doing myself a disservice. I have so many oppurtunities to learn and grow spiritually but i dont really take advantage of them. I procrastinate my spiritual growth...Im always telling myself oh ill read that later on or oh i can miss it once just things like that and eventually i have stopped reading or stopped praying. i made a goal to read the whole BOM and I got about half way through and then justified to myself about how I could just skip reading one time and that I would make it up but IT NEVER HAPPENED!! im sick of it!! Im dissapointing myself with such little easy things like reading a few pages or even a few verses! Why I cant do even that is beyond me!

These past few Sundays I really felt like the lessons were meant for me. I went to relief society with my mom and the lesson was about tools and a keystone possibly, not real sure, But she told a story of a good friend of hers who became sick with cancer. She said that this women was just amazing and so strong in the church just one of those people everyone wants to be like. Anyways. This lady developed cancer and eventually the kimo stopped working and she was told she was going to die. The story goes on and its such an amazing story so if you want to actually hear it I would ask Sister Hancock to tell you. But she tells of her friend and how on her death bed she makes sure that she completes visiting teaching. she even apologized about it because she had to call instead of going and visiting them. It was such a testimony to me to hear a story about a women who was dying but still made it a point and took the time even though she was so ill to do what she needed to do. I felt so inadequate, that is what I want to be like. This women did her visiting teaching just days before she passed away. If she can do it I have no excuse to not do it!

Then today in church Sam gave an amazing lesson. Now Sam is another person I really look up to. Sam recently had a big struggle with cancer. I think he is doing good now, but not to long ago it was really bad. Amazingly though Sam was in church all dressed up regardless of how he felt. There were days where he could barley walk and was in so much pain, but he was there. He is an amazing person and he gives the best lessons. Today's was on Nephi and his family and the first few chapters of Nephi. But he put a few words up on the board and asked us which of the words we would use to decribe oursleves. It really made me think about it and sadly I was more dissapointed with the words I would have used. But as the lesson went on it made me want to become a different person. Someone better. He challenged us to read the whole Book of Mormon and even made an itenerary for us that would get us through the whole book by the end of the semester. So I along with my roomate have taken it upon ourselves to better ourselves and read the whole book. So far so good!

Well im sure this is the longest blog anyone had ever read in there lifes. But im glad to say that I am finally done and am off to better myself, so wish me luck!